How does one get over the death of their mother?? I suppose you don't, ever. I have become a different person. I feel shut down, numb, nothing matters. I want to do things with my dogs but then when I think of doing something I get a panic attack and cant do it.
I'm taking off for awhile, I don't know how long, I have put no pressure on myself to know when I'm coming home. I am bringing my dogs, I need them, especially Lync who is very in tuned to me and my emotions.
At times I am restless, can't stop moving or get comfortable, at times I feel like screaming my head off. At these times I go in to the bath tub and listen to relaxing music until I can calm down.
Anyway, I did something out of the blue just now, I don't know why I did it, but I went with the feeling I had in my gut. I think someone was pushing me to do it so I followed my heart. I went to the Chapters site and there under Bibles was a gorgeous purple Bible. My favourite colour, before I could tell myself I had no money , or this was stupid, I bought it. Not sure if I will read it or not, I guess I will find out. Interesting anyway, so stay tuned.
