|Wine for me & 2 toys for Linc :)|
It was a bit easier to be at the trial this time then when I was at Spruce Meadows. I am slowly starting to feel less of the pain. There are some that don't understand why I am still "dwelling" on this. Why I can't just move on, get over it. I can't tell you how many people have said, well at least he doesn't have cancer, or at least you still have your dog. Not just one person either, many.
Who decides what time limit you have to feel bad? I understand people do not want to always hear about how sad you are, it's depressing to continually hear the same old sad story, people would rather you just lie & say, "I feel awesome, thanks for asking " I get that, really I do. I have family that I just don't ask them how they are doing anymore, because I really don't want to hear the same thing over & over.
I do not hide my feelings very well, so please don't ask me how am I feeling if you don't want to hear the truth, that I feel shitty, & sad & depressed, & I still cry alot, but I'm working on it. I am not giving myself a time limit, I will feel how I feel for as long as it takes & I could care less how that makes me look.
I had Brad bring Kort to the trial on Saturday as Dr Devall was there doing appointments. She was so pleased with how much Kort has improved from his last visit to see her in Calgary. When I say improved I don't mean his Spondylosis has disappeared, but his core is strengthening . We do however have a new problem . I mentioned to her how I hear something crack when he is getting up from his down position while doing his exercises. She checked him out & feels it is a neurological problem, rather then structural, super :(
There is a spot on his lower back that is the problem , possibly some nerve root issue I think she said, we are just monitoring it right now , I have some new exercises to get him working his right back leg & foot, if it gets worse, or he starts seeming to be in pain, we will have to think of doing a CT scan.
We go back to see Dr Devall in Sept, so hopefully there will be even more improvement.
So that's about it in a nutshell, I'm happy that all the exercises are paying off for Kort & I hope whatever is going on with his back leg improves as well.