Update

Joanne and I in Thunder Bay

Joanne has been in hospice care now for a week.  She took a turn for the worse after I returned home from my visit.  I am not sure if she will ever get out at this point and I am scared.  The other day she had a CT scan which should have the results for us in a few day.  Her one doctor fears it is the tumour in her back causing all the problems.  He thinks it has grown and is pressing on nerves in her back and legs.  They have her at the top of the pain medication they can give her right now, any more and she will do nothing but sleep.  I just want her to be pain free.  I want to go back right now so I can sit with her during the day but cant afford to go back again so soon.  I really wish I had never left Thunder Bay now so I was there .   Its all just so sad.

CT Results......we heard from the doctor today and it is bad news.  All the tumours have grown and the one in Joanne's back is severing her spine , she will not be coming out of the hospice.  We knew this was coming but we are all just devastated.  Joanne knows all this as well.  Joanne has a strong will to live and a strong heart, I am selfish and want her to stay with us but also part of me just wants her to be pain free, I just feel numb.