Thursday, January 29, 2015

Feeling Good!

2 weeks ago my Dr. gave me some samples of a pill to add to the anti depressants I am already taking.
The ones I am on now I have been on for 2 years.  They are working, they helped me out of a terrible depression that I had 2 years ago, but did nothing for my anxiety. 
If you suffer from anxiety you will understand just how awful it is.  If you don't I will try to explain.  You can't just, "get over it", like many people think.  You can't just go out and exercise and get out of the house to help it either.   For me it felt like a gnawing pressure in the middle of my chest, almost like the weird feeling you get when you are frightened.   It was never ending, day in and day out it was there.  Trying to keep busy helped, but the problem with my anxiety/depression is I didn't want to leave the house, ever, and the second I stopped being busy there it was again.
I would get anxious the morning of a dog class for instance, already feeling like I didn't want to go.  I had to force myself to take the dogs out for a walk.  It was all consuming, even at bedtime.  It was absolutely exhausting.

I have monthly visits with my Dr, the last time I said to him, " what I feel like doing is going home and drinking an entire bottle of wine, getting drunk so my mind will be numb and I won't feel like this"  That's when he gave me Ambilify to try.  I thought what the hell, nothing else seems to be working , and quite frankly I was at the end of my rope. 

Within 3 days I felt a bit less pressure, less worry.  Within a week I felt more energetic, I was guarded though, thinking there is no way this could happen so fast, if it was happening at all.  I went online to check it out and so many people said the same thing, that within just a few days they were feeling better.

I am hopeful that I will continue to feel better, I am not waking up hating to face the day.  I am going to my 3 classes a week and I am not stressing about leaving the house!! That alone is huge!!  So fingers crossed this is the pill that helps me feel normal again.

I am sharing all of  this in hopes that if someone with anxiety reads it they will not give up trying, keep on your Dr, tell him exactly how you feel, no sugar coating. 
I am also on a wait list to see a psychiatrist at the advice of my Dr.  I would love his opinion on what he thinks  about what I go through.   It is defiantly gotten worse as I age.   I  hate that I  need pills, I would rather not take them, but until you have been in my body and mind, don't judge, trust me when I say, this is a huge relief!!


Sharrie said...

So glad to hear of someone who got relief with a drug they advertise on tv. AND so happy that you got some of the relief that you so deserve!
I bet your dogs are doing a little dance with you.

manymuddypaws said...

Good for you Jo. Glad you are feeling better.

Tammy Taylor said...

Super! We love pills in this house---keeping 2 people healthy and living life here.

Squishy said...

I am so glad we text! Oxoxoxo!!!